just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
