please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Randomize