i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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