Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"