he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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