Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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