Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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