haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
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Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
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She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea