i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
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if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
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This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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