considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
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Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
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I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I would ride that face into the sunset
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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