why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
