it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
smell my finger.
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My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
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Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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