so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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