Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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