Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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