he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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