Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
