You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
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he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
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Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
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