happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
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At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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