I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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