I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
