let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
