Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
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Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
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Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
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