yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize