i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
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