so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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