I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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