I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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