That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Why is your signature on my underwear?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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