I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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