i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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