It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I could fuck to npr.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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