I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
