I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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