put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
