apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
