Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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