their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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