theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
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