I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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