was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
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you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
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I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.