we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize