every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.