do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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