you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i came on her dog
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it