How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
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Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
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I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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