Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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