Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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