she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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