didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
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I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
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Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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